We have infinite access—tutorials, experts, reviews, everything just a click away. But even with all that at our fingertips, it can feel oddly hard to find what we truly need.

When I needed a mix engineer for my last album, I reached out to at least ten people online. No dice.

Then I remembered a producer I interned for years ago. We hadn’t spoken in forever, and I almost didn’t reach out. But when I did, he connected me with someone he trusted—and that person ended up being the perfect fit.

Cold outreach didn’t get me what I needed. It was an old, unplanned connection. And even meeting the producer back in the day was unplanned — I just happened to be in the right community at the right time growing up.

Take another example: these days, as a gigging musician, most of my gigs come through warm leads. Here's how it typically plays out: the event's in motion, people are chit-chatting, and I lean into curiosity—asking about their lives. It gets reciprocal, and soon music comes up. I share what I do, and there's often a spark where I'm invited to share my music at another event, yoga class — you name it.

Yesterday I went to an event at Alchemy Springs, a newish spa in SF that hosts all sorts of events. I saw someone I had recently bumped into at a wedding the week prior. She mentioned she’d be happy to host events at her home, which could fit about 40 people. We got talking, and I floated the idea of a house concert. A mutual excitement ensued, and we agreed to plan the event in the coming days or weeks.

There's an organic flow to finding new performance opportunities that beats the cold outreach by email. It may not scale in the same way a tech product can, but there's something about the humanity of it that flows more easily.

Hot take: most high-upside opportunities don’t come from cold calls or direct outreach. They come through random connections — gatherings, parties, and other serendipitous paths that have nothing to do with pure utility.

Call it networking or whatever feels right for the business mind. I prefer a framing of genuine interest, curiosity, and love for people that leads to unforeseen opportunities.

Detachment from outcome and trust in the flow of connection lead to surprising results. I'll be honest, I feel anxiety even writing that line: if we cannot measure or control these outcomes, how in the world can we trust them?

A coach once told me: "you navigate the world through people." And reflecting back on my life, I do see how it was the happenstance conversations, the unplannable interactions, and the random connections that led to the most amazing opportunities. Whenever I tried to control my outcomes tightly, rather than navigate fluidly, my results were stifled.

Here's my call to action: don’t track your connections in a CRM. Don’t obsess over which conversation leads to which result.

Let’s stop treating opportunity like something to force, track, or optimize.

You don’t have the time or money to employ yourself as a data scientist of your every move.

Just show up. Be curious.

There’s wisdom in showing up fully—and trusting the chain of connection that follows.